"it creates false hope," he said.

"in my own head, i guess." The evening was cool atop the hill in the middle of Queen Elizabeth park. "Maybe not hope... No, no, I meant more that it prompts my imagination, which goes weird places."

John Doe had just received a message from a friend of his that had recently moved away. "She said she might have made a mistake, and that there were some troubles at home. We didn't expect things to be perfect, or even normal, but I felt badly for her. I do, still, now. We understood certain things about ourselves that were singular to us, and I know that sounds stupid to you, especially since nothing happened or anything. We were, or are, just friends, though that seems to imply that there is something less intrinsic and meaningful in friendship."

What psychobabble. Laughable. He ran his palm down the pleat of his slacks. He didn't usually dress this way, that much was clear. But he often thought this way, that much was clear also. Cherry blossoms fell from the trees, as they often do in the springtime.

"I always read too far into my relationships with people," he said. "Any kind of relationship, I mean; spiritual, physical, mental, whatever. It's stupid to overthink things like that, I suppose, but it's just part of my personality, I guess you could say. What's funny is how little I consider other things in comparison. If I had my way, I'd change a lot of people's lives around... and I don't mean in the typically altruistic public way. Specific people, that I personally know, deserve to be in different situations. I feel good that I wish I could make them happy."

He nervously or unconsciously repeated the pleat-smoothing motion. It seems that while a great many people put little to no thought into their relationships at all, a nearly equal amount believe that they consider their friendships and romantic engagements too deeply. They probably do; it is the opinion of this publication that since humans are so fundamentally stupid, they should not be under any notable intellectual burden. All the important thinking should really be left to those who are qualified for the task, like whales or moose. What the fuck do moose do all day besides eat, anyway?

"Well, whatever. I mean, either it's a thing, or it isn't. I should probably spend some more time online and try to get in touch with them. That's the right thing to do, isn't it?"

How should we know? Ask someone with a degree in that.